20 Random Things…

1) Getting pregnant at 36  is apparently a lot easier than one thought. I now have a new perspective for the teenage girl who swears she only did it once…

2) People say stupid shit. The older I get the more shit I seem to hear.

3) I lose respect for men who dye their hair.

4) After ten years of building a life together I was just recently told something that changed things forever: “Babe, you don’t have to fold my underwear. Just throw them in the drawer.” Really? I wish I would have known this 3,241 loads of laundry ago.

5) I do believe the gods of childbirth grant us mothers eyes in the backs of our heads…purely as an exchange for the pains of labor, delivery, post delivery, lack of sleep….

6) It is only now, pregnant with our second child that I realize what little clue I had the first time around. For her entire infancy, the only place I had to put my daughter down was the cradle in our room and her crib. Nothing in the den – no swing, no pack-n-play, nothing. Did I just carry her around the entire time? I think I did.

7) Sex while pregnant is an interesting landscape to explore. Sure the sex is great if you can actually manage to actually have sex. The last time we actually managed to actually have (big belly pregnant) sex once it was over I burst into laughter and Brian’s exact words were, “Well, that was awkward.”

8 ) Is it strange that I really want my children to know the difference between and when to use “good” and “well?”

9) Just this morning I heard a great piece of advice on parenting: You can’t spoil children as long as there is a healthy balance of discipline.

10) Which brings me to the concept of discipline. Too often we misinterpret the word to mean punishment, which is not the case. Discipline means to teach; we have to teach our children first before we can ever punish them. Which brings me to my favorite statement that “children are not born with table manners.”

11) I can’t serve myself either milk or orange juice without first vigorously shaking the container.

12) Guilt produces nothing positive. Making a decision from a place of guilt usually ends with poor results. I blogged about mother’s guilt a while back and I think I am truly living by the advice I was once given by a very wise woman, “Melanie, put down the stick.” It’s a good thing….try it!

13) It is okay for our children to realize that Mommy and Daddy don’t have all of the answers. I think it is better for our children to see us as human rather than as perfect.

14) Our children deserve answers when they ask us questions. Even though some questions are exceptionally hard to answer, age appropriate facts are far better than fantasy. So no, Grandma isn’t really at a neighbor’s house “taking a nap.”

15) I never would have thought that HGTV would provide such a window into the lives of other people. Watch one episode of House Hunters and get a glimpse of how some people live. So you mean you knew your house was going to be on national television and yet you chose not to clean the mold off of your bathroom sink?

16) Children are like little preying animals….they seek out the path of least resistance. My daughter just announced that when her baby brother is born she would like for me to take care of him and for her daddy to take care of her. Why? Most likely because she knows her daddy won’t make her put her face in the water at swimming lessons.

17) Did you know that same-sex couples who are in a committed relationship or even in a civil union pay approximately twice as much then a married person does on federal taxes? TWICE AS MUCH for doing many of the same things I do – owning a home together, paying taxes, building a family, and so forth yet we get the tax break because only one of us has a penis. How do we still allow this in 2011?

18) I love surprises. Only when I know about them so I can dress accordingly.

19) I grew up being mothered by a woman who was extraordinarily positive. Her positive spin on all of life surely drove me crazy growing up. How can she be so happy while cleaning out the litter box?? I’m starting to wonder if my family feels that way about me. You do become your parents, after all. When Brian was complaining recently about his new cell phone and not sure how to use the new features I reminded him to be positive. “Consider yourself lucky. Some children don’t get brand new phones…think of it as a good aggravation!” I was pretty sure at that moment he saw me as the real aggravation.

20) Some mornings I drop off my daughter wearing rather interesting clothing combinations. For example the purple shirt with a horse on it paired with lime green leggings, topped off with two tiny hair bows – one lavender and one blue. Oh, and socks pulled up to her knees. Her confidence in her choices and pride at being able to put it all on by herself helps me quell my desire for her to dress a certain way. (The skirt I picked out was way better than the leggings!) It also helps me realize that, well it’s not about me. Her life is not about me. Her life is about her and sometimes I need to keep my opinions out of it. It’s more important for me to raise confident children, not just well-dressed ones.

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