How Far Away, Exactly?

I recently stumbled across something that truly caught my attention. I haven’t blogged in ages and a lot has been going on. I traveled for the first time since my Prince was born and had total flying anxiety. I had several experiences lately where I made the mistake of having the basic expectation that people will do their job. Those expectations resulted in epic failures. (I may indeed have to rant about that…later) My sweet Pickle was officially accepted into formal Preschool for the Fall and my little Prince started saying “dada.” As exciting (and aggravating) as all of that has been, none of it propelled me to write. Except this.

We all need a break, no argument there. But does one need three weeks away from life to make things right? I ran across an advertisement for the opportunity to get away for up to three weeks to revitalize your life. Our lives are so busy and can be so stressful, granted. Especially if you add children on top of work, family, friends, and anything else that you care even the slightest bit about. There seems to be fewer and fewer hours in each day. Nights get longer and days get shorter. I know I am not the only mother in this world who leaves each morning looking back at a den full of toys, paper, small cut-outs of paper, crayons, tape, empty bowls with lingering crumbs of goldfish, and a random pacifier only to dim the lights with the faintest of hopes that by that afternoon when we return somehow it is all back in order. I know I am not the only one who focuses on what’s important: getting everyone fed, bathed, exceptionally loved, clean clothes, and clean toilets. I’ve expanded my limits on dust bunnies. I can’t dust and vacuum every day. If you come to my house and find dust bunnies, two things: First, I dare you to tell me you don’t have them, and two, if you judge me by my dust bunnies then I don’t want to be your friend anyway.

Believe me, I need a break once in a while, too but do I need to be away from my life for three weeks? We all need to unplug, agreed. But do I need to disconnect for so long that my infant son only says “dada” because he doesn’t think he has a “mama?” The only way for me to rejuvenate is for me to leave the continent? It just seems so, I don’t know, so impossible for anyone with a job? Impossible for anyone with just a cat even. I’m not trying to shoo the idea of a long vacation from your life but it makes me wonder about those advertising for things like this. I suppose their clientele is mainly single people with fish? I’m just guessing.

So yes, we all get tired. We all get stressed. No one wants to be up at midnight, four, five, and up for the day at six. (That was might night, by the way) But truly, when my wake-up call is a sweet baby boy who is now saying “dada” I couldn’t have been happier to steal those few moments this morning (before it was even light out!) with him just the two of us. We talked, we played, he chewed on his feet…it was a dreamy morning. Having a four-year-old vomit in the middle of the night is no picnic, I know, I know. But having her snuggle so close to you (but not too close so she doesn’t breathe her sickness germs into your nose) you can literally hear her sleep is truly priceless. Yes, my bath, my shower, even my conversations with Brian are all being invaded by little people. But…these moments are fleeting and soon we won’t all be able to fit in the same bed! All kidding aside, far too soon they won’t need us as much.

So, yes we need to get away. But maybe just dinner and a movie? I’m good with being able to get in bed early enough to watch Bethanny Ever After. Time to paint my toes? Alone. How about a chat with my husband while I’m walking to pick up lunch? Even better, how about lunch with him! Life is hard, we can all agree on that. But (a thought from another blog) maybe it’s hard because we are doing it right? Maybe if we were all just a bunch of slackers it would be really easy? Maybe it’s not really that hard at all…maybe it’s just in the way we frame it? Maybe instead of taking three weeks to “get away” from the life we have, maybe we should spend three weeks digging in deeper to simply fall in love with the life we do have. Maybe…

Happy Mothering,

Melanie

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